What does it mean when a guy says he needs space to think
Now, listen carefully: what you do after he asks you for space is super important. When guys get upset, they like to go into their shell to get some perspective on the issue at hand. If you spend tons of time with someone but you fight all the time, no one would call that a great relationship. But if your schedules conspire so that you can only spend a little time with each other, but that time is amazing — anyone can see that you have a great relationship.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: What To Do When A Man Says He Needs Space
Why Men Pull Away & Ask For Space In A Relationship — And What To Do About It
When I was younger I assumed, incorrectly it turns out, that I would find the man of my dreams in my early twenties. So when I finally was able to transition into a healthy relationship I held on so tight I was literally suffocating him, and he uttered those words that bring fear into the eyes of every love-sick woman.
I need space, he has said. In my small brain hearing those three little words instead of the more adorable better known 3-word phrase, I thought it was over. See, I had lived alone for more than 10 years. Space was the absolute last thing I could ever imagine needing in a relationship that meant so much to me. It was only in the last year of living alone that I had gone from seeing life as sad, lonely, and pathetic to the happy gift it truly is. Finding him, mostly because of this newfound positive attitude, confirmed that positivity and brought me a lot of joy.
Being immersed in a new relationship is one of those things that truly takes your breath away. You share secrets, past heartache, and what gets you fired up in both positive and negative ways.
This new relationship keeps you in this bubble of joy that seems lit by a thousand candles or something equally as mushy. So when he said he needed space, the walls of my bubble burst and the candles blew out and I was once again rooted back in reality. Seeing as though I had spent nearly my entire life seeing the glass as more than half empty I had to truly fight my natural instinct to crumble. So I asked him if it was me he needed space from.
Ladies, this is not the correct question. He said yes. A long conversation ensued, one which was clearly the exact opposite of the space he needed. However, luckily for me, he indulged my curiosity and shared why it was he needs space. I will spare you the details of the conversation because it is private and ours, but I wanted to write this post to share some of my key takeaways from the whole experience. My conversation with my man straightened things out and I understood what he was going for and why it was important to him.
In fact, since that day I will sometimes purposely place space in our relationship so he can have it without asking. With my own space, I found myself researching whether or not this was something that happened to other people or if I was the first person ever to have to handle that 3-word phrase.
As it turns out, no I am not alone but I did find myself being grateful for having the conversation. There are many reasons a man could need space, and some will not want to talk about it. If he says he needs space from you, you need to allow him to have it.
Give him a reasonable amount of time to handle his own stuff, and then see what happens next. Maybe he wanted to play video games in his favorite hole filled sweat pants. Or perhaps, he needed to get a project done before the deadline and loves to do them on his own in a special way. Distance does make the heart grow fonder.
This concept here is a delicate one, and I am sharing it with you because I think if you are searching for answers as to why your man is looking for space you deserve to hear this.
You many notice him pulling away not just coming out and asking for space. If this is you, how are you reacting? Are you pulling him closer, holding on tighter, smothering him with love and hugs more than ever? He may need a breather to be his bro self and your death grip may now be pushing him further away from you. Think about it. If you have been hurt in the past, you may be fighting to try to keep him. Or if you are like me, someone who spent a great deal of time in a lonely world, you may be fighting to keep that as a past reality.
Reread that. He may be the one who expressed he needed space, but you may need it too. Have you been putting off your favorite spin class to fit in more boyfriend time? Take the time to remember who you are and do something you truly love.
When he says, he needs space there are a few things you should do. Remind him to be open with you. Give him the space he needs and take the time to grab a slice of your own space. Do something you truly love. And your relationship will be stronger. There are many times when a man will again use that dreaded 3-word phrase and you try to give him that space and things end anyway. What you need to do is work on you at that point. Focus on letting go of the relationship and moving on to a place of self-love and confidence.
I know you are thinking this is easier said than done. But if you are in a relationship you need to maintain your identity, love yourself and stay the confident strong person you are meant to be. Learn to overcome them and bring strength back into your life. Focus on staying positive and focus on the fact that the universe has other plans for you.
He Says He Needs Space
These six little words usually arrive out of the blue and plunge you into a world of confusion. In fact, there are four steps you can do right now, to bring him back. Before you put them into action, though, you need to take care of your own mindset. To do so, remember that:.
When I was younger I assumed, incorrectly it turns out, that I would find the man of my dreams in my early twenties. So when I finally was able to transition into a healthy relationship I held on so tight I was literally suffocating him, and he uttered those words that bring fear into the eyes of every love-sick woman. I need space, he has said. In my small brain hearing those three little words instead of the more adorable better known 3-word phrase, I thought it was over. See, I had lived alone for more than 10 years.
The One Perfect Thing to Say When a Man Says He Needs “Space”
Subscribe To Our Newsletter! Some men are afraid of commitment or of getting in too deep too fast. Instead, he wants to send you into a panic wondering if this is the beginning of the end or whether he really does need a break. When guys feel no progress, or they feel stuck, their first move is to step away. The pressures and expectations of the relationship are putting him in an uncomfortable position and he just wants a break from it all. He believes if he takes a break, he will be able to figure out what he should do next. If he has been pursuing another woman or has suddenly bumped into a woman that makes his heart beat a mile a minute, that could be the reason he is telling you he needs his space. He might want to go out with this woman just to gauge how strong his feelings are for you. If you are the type to demand a lot and openly smother him, this is cause for him to want to step away, so he can come up for air.
What To Do When He Says He Needs Space
The anxiety of a man needing space. It can make you feel blinded by fear of the worst. Unfortunately and fortunately, this dizzy time of worry and stress is so important for the future of your relationship with this man. First of all, I want to say that this article is for women who are already in an exclusive relationship.
What to Do When He Says He Needs Space
Here’s Exactly What To Do When He Says He Needs Space