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How to select a girl as life partner

Barton Goldsmith. What really jumped out at me was this line: "Picking the right person for the right reasons at the right time is an art form. With the divorce rates as high as they are, it makes sense that it takes the right person, right time and right reasons to make a fulfilling and strong relationship. I love Dr. Goldsmith's tips, and as a nice complement, I wanted to write my own:.

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How Girls Choose their Boyfriend Or Life partner By Sandeep Maheshwari latest in hindi 2017

10 Tips for Choosing the Right Partner

As a culture, we spend hours upon hours developing academic knowledge, building physical fitness, deciding where to go to college or learning about finances. But we spend very little, if any, time teaching young people how to make the most important decision of their lives. Because that's what it is — your choice of life partner will affect the quality of your life much, much more than where you go to college, what you do for a living or where you make your home.

Grandma and Papa my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary this year, and two sets of aunts and uncles are celebrating their 20th and 30th anniversaries. Your father and I aren't quite that far along at 12 years, but we are very happily married, and those relatives would tell you the same. Though to be fair, they would tell you this even if they weren't, as would a lot of people, which only adds to the lack of education on the subject.

So when it comes to choosing a life partner and sticking together, I like to think we have some excellent examples around us. I'm no expert on love or relationships; I only know what I know through experience as I've watched partnerships around me succeed or fail.

So armed with that knowledge, here are eight things I hope you'll consider when choosing your life partner. While it's good to have things in common, like enjoying a relaxing sunny day or hitting the slopes, it's also a good idea to find a partner who's strong where you are weak.

Do you share the same desires when it comes to having kids or not? At least two of your relatives got divorced because the answer to this question was no. Do you have similar attitudes toward religion or spirituality? Do you agree about general personal finance practices — debt payments, savings, splurge purchases?

Lastly, and don't underestimate the weight of this one, as it has had a huge impact on your parents' marriage: When it comes to spending time with each other's families holidays, vacations and taking care of aging parents, are you in agreement on what's reasonable?

Those commonalities are important, but there's something to be said for having someone who's strong where you are weak. It creates a nice balance and a natural split of responsibilities. For example, I hate dealing with companies — cable companies, banks, electric companies. Meanwhile, he can't survive on just a few hours sleep, whereas I can, so I'm the one who gets up with you two and the pets during the night and on weekend mornings so he can rest.

Some people may say that scenario represents stereotypical gender roles, but we both work full-time and have responsibilities at home, so it seems fair to me. You'll spot shared weaknesses fairly quickly. For example, when your father and I bought our two-story home with a small-but-high-maintenance yard in , we were overjoyed. However, we soon realized neither one of us had any desire to take care of the yard. He grew up in high-rise condos where they didn't have a yard.

And I grew up in a home where my father did all that, so I couldn't even start a lawnmower. As a result, our yard is an overgrown mess, the neighbors politely but consistently ask if they can help us clean up, and each fall I comb Craigslist for someone to come bag up all the leaves.

Oh well. This may look like the perfect happy couple, but perfection is subjective. What I think is perfect may not be what you think is perfect, which is why there's no such thing. So don't expect it from a mate.

Don't make a checklist — mental or otherwise — of traits your future partner must have. You can't conjure up your perfect mate and go buy said robot at Target. If you must make a list, make a list of deal-breakers: no smokers, no drug addictions, no one with a violent felony conviction. Those are healthy boundaries to set. Some say opposites attract, and that can be true as in the yin and yang mentioned above.

But sometimes you need someone with whom you're just a natural fit. Are you both foodies who like to cook or dine out? Do you both have a sense of wanderlust?

Are you both couch potatoes? Do you both have a passion for learning? Similarities in activity level and ambition can make for a pair and eventually a family that likes to do things together. Basically, do you have fun together? I've had more fun with your father than anyone else, ever. He makes me belly laugh all the time.

A recent study of more than 24, married couples shows you will likely end up with someone similar to yourself — at least in terms of education level, height and weight, and possibly even political preference and psychiatric disorders.

If your prospective future mate is a slob, don't expect them to morph into a neatnik just for you. Sure, some things can change.

Maybe a bad cook can get better or someone who snores terribly can tweak a sleep routine to fix it. But ask yourself, if the quality you dislike never changed, could you still love and live with this person? When the lust phase has passed, will you still enjoy spending quiet time together? Can you be yourself around this person? I mean, really, truly yourself. Can you laugh until you snort like your mother does and not feel embarrassed?

Can you express opinions that may be unpopular or contrary to theirs and not feel alienated? Can you admit that you don't know something without worry of judgement? Life partner means for the rest of your life, and hopefully that will be a loooooong time. When you're middle aged and exhausted and can't muster up the energy to party all night, will you enjoy a quiet night at home with just the two of you? Do you have long talks or conversations where you feel interested in this person and what they have to say?

Do they make you laugh? This is why some people say it's good to be friends first. If you genuinely like them, I think you're more likely to keep investing in the relationship and trying to make it work, even especially? Whether romantic, business or otherwise, these qualities make for a good partnership: empathy, integrity, honesty, reliability, stability and emotional availability. When you hit bumps along the road — and you will, whether it's a serious illness, a death in the family or job loss — a good life partner will demonstrate those qualities and help you get through it.

But there's nothing like hard times to show who's loyal to you and who's not. If life hands you a lemon and your partner bails on you emotionally, it's time to reconsider your choice.

The decision of choosing a life partner is yours and yours alone. This is what I've learned from my own experience, and I'm just trying to share as much knowledge as I can to help you with the process. No matter whom you choose, your father and I will still love you more than anything else in the world.

11 Things You Should Contemplate Before Choosing a Life Partner

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I've long felt that choosing a life partner should be a subject that is thoroughly discussed sometime in high school and perhaps even in university. It amazes me that so little time, if any, is given to considering this topic on a meaningful level in school.

On my book tour for Love Cycles , three of the most common questions I was asked were these: "How do I know this person is right for me? None of these questions has a simple answer. When we're under love's spell, most of us are willing to do anything, say anything, and be anything. Anyone who has watched Oprah can give the right answers; it's how we live that holds the key to really knowing us. The way we feel when we fall in love doesn't necessarily mean that we are with the right person.

A letter to my daughters: How to choose a life partner

As a culture, we spend hours upon hours developing academic knowledge, building physical fitness, deciding where to go to college or learning about finances. But we spend very little, if any, time teaching young people how to make the most important decision of their lives. Because that's what it is — your choice of life partner will affect the quality of your life much, much more than where you go to college, what you do for a living or where you make your home. Grandma and Papa my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary this year, and two sets of aunts and uncles are celebrating their 20th and 30th anniversaries. Your father and I aren't quite that far along at 12 years, but we are very happily married, and those relatives would tell you the same. Though to be fair, they would tell you this even if they weren't, as would a lot of people, which only adds to the lack of education on the subject. So when it comes to choosing a life partner and sticking together, I like to think we have some excellent examples around us.

mindbodygreen

And at first glance, research seems to back this up, suggesting that married people are on average happier than single people and much happier than divorced people. Dissatisfied single people should actually consider themselves in a neutral, fairly hopeful position, compared to what their situation could be. All the research on how vastly happiness varies between happy and unhappy marriages makes perfect sense, of course. Well, start by subtracting your age from So given that this is by far the most important thing in life to get right, how is it possible that so many good, smart, otherwise-logical people end up choosing a life partnership that leaves them dissatisfied and unhappy?

Common attributes that come to mind include intelligence, kindness, sense of humor, attractiveness, or reliability.

Choosing a life partner is the most important decision you will ever make — far more crucial than choosing a job, house or group of friends. The course of love never did run smoothly, and neither did the course of quitting your job, moving house, having children or dealing with tragedy. The right person will put their cards on the table, even if it means risking getting hurt. Life is hard enough without worrying about whether someone is going to show up or call when they say they will — a reliable, solid partner will never leave you wondering where you stand.

17 important qualities to look for in your life partner

How to find a life partner or choosing the right life partner is a high stake decision and it starts with understanding what to look for in a life partner. Finding the right partner is essential for a happy and healthy marriage. As pleasant as it may sound it can be very confusing to choose your life partner. As an individual you need to know what do you look for in a relationship and how to choose a life partner.

Talking about the present scenario, it really looks like our ultra-modern and progressive generation would hardly ever get to know what actual love is. Today's generation is simply dwelling between break-ups and patch-ups and they are quite far away from the idea of arrange marriage and being a "one woman" man or "one man" woman. But still I hope there would be some people of our breed believing in traditions and culture. Usually there are two types of marriage in our society, first is love marriage in which both individuals fall in love and get married on the basis of that love and nothing else matters much and the second is arrange marriage in which two individuals get serious about getting married even before selecting their partners. Love marriage needs no effort for both individuals because they already know each other from a quite long time but arrange marriage take loads of efforts for both individuals as their partners are complete strangers to them.

Six Questions to Consider in Choosing a Life Partner

Updated: September 3, Reader-Approved References. Choosing your life partner — the person you want to spend the rest of your days with — is one of the most important decisions you'll make in your life. Living most of your life with the person you love can be a joyous, mutually-fulfilling experience, but finding and choosing the right person can be a monumental task. Luckily, it's something that most people go through, so you're not alone: in the U. Not exactly! Sometimes, our family and friends make great examples of good relationships and the kind you want to avoid too. Still, this isn't a required step to finding your partner.

Here are five clues that will help you find out whether or not someone has the qualities to go the distance and be a great life partner.

Talking about the present scenario, it really looks like our ultra-modern and progressive generation would hardly ever get to know what actual love is. But still I hope there would be some people of our breed believing in traditions and culture. Usually there are two types of marriage in our society, first is love marriage in which both individuals fall in love and get married on the basis of that love and nothing else matters much and the second is arrange marriage in which two individuals get serious about getting married even before selecting their partners. Love marriage needs no effort for both individuals because they already know each other from a quite long time but arrange marriage take loads of efforts for both individuals as their partners are complete strangers to them.

8 Things To Consider While Selecting Life Partner In Arranged Marriage

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How to Pick Your Life Partner – Part 1

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Comments: 5
  1. Tojam

    Simply Shine

  2. Gushakar

    What words... super, a remarkable phrase

  3. Tajar

    You are certainly right. In it something is also I think, what is it excellent thought.

  4. Dojin

    In it something is. Many thanks for the help in this question, now I will not commit such error.

  5. Brataur

    Let's be.

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