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How to help your partner out of depression

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I have seen how it can take the joy, energy, and sense of purpose out of everyday life. I also know how hard it can be to support someone who is living with depression. Depression may look different from person to person, but at its core the illness often causes people to feel lonely, inadequate, and misunderstood. One of the most prevalent symptoms of depression is a feeling of isolation. When someone with depression withdraws from loved ones without communicating why, it leaves a lot of room for misinterpretation. One partner may not understand why the other is distant, distracted, or even angry.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: What to Do When Your Spouse Is Struggling With Depression

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Supporting a partner with depression

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When your partner is depressed, it can feel like your world is falling apart. You may struggle to understand why the person you love is suddenly different, and you likely want to know what brought this drastic change on and how to fix it.

During an episode of depression you may feel helpless, overwhelmed, and in pain. Your partner may withdraw from you or feel like a burden. However, depression does not mean that your relationship is broken. Your relationship can improve. When you are dealing with a partner with depression, you first need to take care of yourself.

Caring for someone who is struggling takes every ounce of your strength and you need to feel that you have enough resources before you can offer any to them. Gathering up your resources and rallying your support system is essential to feeling like you can get through this. This might mean scheduling weekly phone calls with someone you trust, seeing a therapist yourself, or joining a support group.

During hard moments, remind yourself that it requires courage to face depression head on and to choose to love your partner during their struggle. Allow yourself to reflect on your incredible capacity for love and care. Find Outlets — Engagement is the enemy of depression. Make plans that you can look forward to, celebrate accomplishments, and savor your connections. This is not to say that you should use activities to distance yourself from your partner, but you are allowed to be active and explore new possibilities even if your partner is not able to join you at that moment.

Focus On Love — When the going gets tough remind yourself of all the things that you love about your partner. If your partner feels up for it, this might be a conversation to have with them. Trade memories of good times back and forth or make a list of your top 10 favorite things about them. Recall an especially good memory and linger with it for an extended period of time, letting it really sink in. Deepening these thoughts will help counterbalance the weight of your shared experience of depression.

This is not necessarily a bad thing! You can grow stronger and closer in your efforts to manage depression and help your partner cope. You love your partner and want them to feel better. Depression is a slippery slope, and sometimes your best intentions can actually make the situation worse. Here are some guidelines to consider when trying to help your partner through their depression.

Educate Yourself — Depression is a mental illness that can be triggered by life events, biological changes, and genetic predisposition. The symptoms of depression include sad mood, low energy, irritability, social isolation, trouble focusing or accomplishing goals, changes in eating and sleeping, and hopelessness.

Doing research and learning about the effects of depression can help you feel more prepared to handle it. Encourage Treatment — Talk therapy, medication, and support groups are all helpful in dealing with depression.

Your partner can learn skills that will help them be more engaged and less isolated. Through therapy and other treatment they may find improvements in their mood and recognize that they are not alone in their struggle.

Therapy can also teach your partner that they are not "broken" and help them towards greater self-acceptance. Telling your partner about all the great things in their life as examples of reasons to not be depressed will not help them and will likely make them feel worse.

If your partner asks, feel free to offer advice or give an alternative perspective to a problem. Keep in mind that your partner will not always be able to absorb your help, though. Sometimes depression feels especially dark and hard to escape from, so your partner may have trouble seeing the things that you are hopeful about. This is not a failing on their part, or yours. It is part of depression, and your partner will appreciate it if you keep offering help.

Your persistence in the belief that they will persevere can inspire much-needed hope. If you -- or someone you know -- need help, please call for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. If you are outside of the U. News U. HuffPost Personal Video Horoscopes.

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9 Tips for Helping a Partner with Depression

Try these: time management relationship advice healthy lifestyle money wealth success leadership psychology. When you married your partner, you agreed to love and support them for better or for worse, through sickness and in health. Though you may have found it easy to maintain your connection when you were both in a good mental space, your vows are tested when one of you experiences emotional issues. Relationships take work, and those that are marked by a depressed spouse take even more work than usual.

When you're in a relationship, whatever your partner deals with, you deal with. And vice versa.

I suffer from depression myself and I know how tough it can be. But I want to talk to the partners - the people living with the people who are living with depression. It can make them say and do things that you just don't understand. I spent three years talking to more than people about their experiences with love, sex, and depression for my book, The Monster Under The Bed. These are their tips.

15 Ways To Support A Partner With Depression That Are Actually Helpful

Karen S. She no longer enjoyed her favorite activities, preferring to spend weekends sleeping in and watching TV. Their sex life was nonexistent. If you experience five or more symptoms for at least two weeks, you could have clinical depression, also known as major depression. Plus, we asked therapists for their best strategies to help you and your partner survive depression together. Your sex drive tanks. When your mood plummets, it usually takes libido with it, says Paz. What you can do: Explain that it really is you, not him. If your doctor recommends antidepressants, ask if you can take medication that will alleviate symptoms without dulling your sex drive even more. What your partner can do for you: Focus on being close without any expectations about the outcome.

How to Help Your Partner Through Their Depression

As men, we like to think of ourselves as strong and in control of our emotions. When we feel hopeless or overwhelmed by despair we often deny it or try to cover it up. But depression is a common problem that affects many of us at some point in our lives, not a sign of emotional weakness or a failing of masculinity. It affects millions of men of all ages and backgrounds, as well as those who care about them—spouses, partners, friends, and family. However, male depression changes how you think, feel, and function in your daily life.

If you are in a relationship with someone who has depression, you are likely struggling with a mix of emotions and hosts of questions.

When your spouse has depression , you might be very worried, and feel utterly helpless. After all, depression is a stubborn, difficult illness. Your partner might seem detached or deeply sad.

5 Signs That Depression Is Eroding Your Relationship

Home Mental Health Depression. Every product is independently selected by our editors. If you buy something through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission. This illness erodes emotional and sexual intimacy and suffuses a relationship with pessimism and resentment, anger and isolation, she explains.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Mental illness consumed my marriage -- until this epiphany

Understanding how depression affects your partner can be key to building a healthy, supportive relationship that cares for the mental wellbeing of both partners. Depression can cause people to withdraw, behave differently or become more irritable. Common symptoms include insomnia, feelings of worthlessness and loss of interest in activities. It can even lead to physical aches and pains. Living with depression for a longer period of time can take a toll on your partner's levels of energy, motivation and passion.

Depression in Men

Standing on the sidelines when a partner battles depression can feel like a helpless experience. You might feel confused, frustrated, and overwhelmed. You are not alone. Depression is an isolating illness that can negatively impact relationships and leave loved ones feeling helpless and afraid. The mood in major depression is often described as sad, hopeless, discouraged, or feeling down, but it can also include persistent anger. Angry outbursts and blaming others is common. Social withdrawal and lack of interest or pleasure are common among depressed people.

Nov 17, - If you're depressed, you could be dragging your mate to the dumps with you. Here are 5 common symptoms that wreck relationships – and.

When one spouse has depression, it can put a strain on a marriage. Living with a depressed partner who is often unhappy, critical and negative isn't easy, and at the same time, it may also be hard to persuade a husband or wife to get help. Jay Baer, a psychiatrist and director of ambulatory services in the department of psychiatry at Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston.

How to help a depressed spouse

Being in a romantic relationship when one or both of you suffer from depression is a massive challenge. Depression can make your partner seem distant. None of that means your relationship is the problem. You two can tackle this together.

Tips for Coping With Depression in a Relationship

When your partner is depressed, it can feel like your world is falling apart. You may struggle to understand why the person you love is suddenly different, and you likely want to know what brought this drastic change on and how to fix it. During an episode of depression you may feel helpless, overwhelmed, and in pain.

It can be hard to be in a relationship with someone with depression. Also, depression can make someone more irritable, angry, or withdrawn.

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10 Ways To Cope With Your Partner’s Depression

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8 Tips for Dealing with a Depressed Spouse

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